AlAnoud Writes

I made a deal with the universe once,

a very polite, well-worded plea:

“Just give me one small shiny thing,

and I’ll stop asking for three.”

A job, a title, a stamped-in-ink pass,

a proof that says you belong

Surely then all the stuck-in-between

would feel slightly less wrong.

I said, “If this arrives, I’ll relax.

I’ll stop this dramatic internal fight.”

The universe blinked, sipped its tea,

and replied, “Not tonight.”

So I paced and I bargained and over-thought,

tripped over my own desire,

Called it greed, called it weakness,

called waiting a spiritual fire.

But alignment, it turns out, isn’t sparkle or proof,

or a gold-embossed reason to smile.

It’s not putting your heart in a holding bay

with a check back later file.

It’s wanting the thing without shrinking your soul,

or tying your peace to a prize.

It’s standing upright in the middle of not yet

with both feet and open eyes.

So today I retire the bargain.

The universe can keep its delays.

I’ll hum while I wait, take up space,

and breathe like I’m already okay.

If the door swings open .. lovely.

If not, I’ll still be here.

Aligned, slightly amused,

and refusing to disappear